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Here's to all the parents who immediately grab the roll of duct tape before going to investigate noises coming from their twin toddlers' room at night. Goodness knows what they dismantled, broke or destroyed this time. :-/ 6/2/2014
Here's to all the parents who understand why it sucks when your toddler doesn't chew up any of the raisins before they swallow them. 1/29/2014
Here's to all the parents who are both joyful and saddened when their child reaches a new milestone. "Wow, look what they can do now!" and then "Who the heck said they could grow up so darn fast!" 11/20/2013
Here's to all the parents who just watched their toddler covertly throw away a toy and now wonder just how many times this has already happened. 11/12/2013
Here's to all the parents who have children who always know the exact wrong moments to wake up. Like after you close down the local bar. Cartoons it is. Well played, baby.
11/10/2013 2:30 A.M.
Here's to all the parents who have to sneak into their kids room at night, just to hear them breathe, even if only for a moment. <3 11/8/2013
Here's to all the parents who cut up their kids' food to prevent choking, but are so paranoid of the hazard, that the food is practically minced. Constant vigilance! 11/7/2013
Here's to all the parents who are at the point in their lives when they are actually HAPPY when "that time of the month" shows up. Whew! Bullet dodged, right? 11/1/2013
Here's to all the parents who know that Daylight Savings in the fall is a total pipe dream. One more hour of sleep? Yeah right, more like a week or so of an F'd up toddler sleep schedule. 10/30/2013
Here's to all the parents who sit down to enjoy a meal, lick something off their fingers and then suddenly remember that they forgot to wash their hands after the last diaper change. Damn it! 10/20/2013
Here's to all the parents who have come to the realization that there are many very distict similarities between toddlers and zombies. 10/18/2013
Here's to all the parents who do whatever it takes to get the kids to eat their dinner. #LadyandtheTramp 10/11/2013
Here's to all the parents who can wrestle a wiggly baby into diapers or clothes, with all of their might, and not leave a mark. Good job you. 9/29/2013
Here's to all the parents who throw a slow flow nipple on the babies morning bottle, even though they are nearly a year old, so you can get those few extra precious moments of shut-eye. 9/15/2013
Here's to all the parents who have ever caught their child eating poop. For you, we'll have a double. 9/10/2013
Here's to all the parents who accidentally let their baby cry too long in the morning before waking up because the baby in your dream was crying and you 1) wished that baby would shut the hell up and then, 2) were trying frantically in the dream to make that baby stop bawling. 9/6/2013
Here's to all the parents who have ever walked crouched behind the couch or a wall so that the children wouldn't see you and then stop playing nicely and quietly just because they noticed you. 8/30/2013
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